This is Verla. I’m not available right now, so you can’t avail yourself of me. Which kinda sounds dirty, but isn’t. Please leave a message after the tone, which I say out of habit in spite of the fact that answering machines and voicemail have been widely used for over 25 years and thus I’m certain you know without being told what to do when you hear said tone. I’ll call you back as soon as I can, and by “can,” I mean as soon as is warranted depending on who you are and whether I really feel a want or need to talk to you. And in the latter case of need, depending on whether I’m really looking forward to it or it’s just an obligation. Thanks, and have a great day, which I realize is something that is just a social convention to say—though in a generic, goodwill-to-all-mankind sort of way, I do of course hope you have one.
**beep**
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